"Mama": a songwriter's journey through grief during a pandemic

“Jesus can you tell me please, how to get over this hurt?” he sings with eyes closed tight. It's nearing the end of April and he fears that the end is nearing for his mom. Quarantined from the rest of the world, Sean and his mother, Brenda, pass the days together, wishing “that this could last forever,” as Sean sings in his latest single “Mama".

Sean Mena, a curly-haired, soft spoken, 21-year-old, is now a student at the University of Utah. Following the death of his mom in May, he moved in with his dad and stepmom in east Salt Lake City. Though he’s still adjusting to his new environment, music continues to be, as it always has been, an essential part of his daily life.

For years Sean has been “obsessed with music; making it, writing it, producing it,” Sean’s cousin and best friend, Gustavo Zelaya, said. Sean has started multiple bands, recording albums with each.

But, music is more than just a hobby for Sean. “Music is a really great outlet for him to put what he’s feeling into writing,” said Serena Hammond, Sean’s girlfriend.

Though writing music has long been Sean's creative outlet, in the spring of 2020, as COVID-19 spread and his mother’s condition worsened, music took on an even more important role in his life. More than ever, music served as an anchor, helping him make sense of the world and process his grief.

This period is encapsulated within the song “Mama”, which he wrote and recorded in the days leading up to his mom’s passing. “Mama,” Sean explained, “talks about religion and whether or not that’s something that can help me through it.”

Now, months later, Sean still listens to “Mama”. He says it’s a way of looking back, remembering how he felt, and seeing how he can grow from his family’s tragic loss.

Since moving in with his dad and stepmom, Sean has created a college-budget music studio in the basement, where he spends his free time experimenting with, and processing his experiences through, music.

Despite having had a year of adversity, Sean remains positive about the future. He’s gained “a bigger appreciation for life,” said Sean’s girlfriend, Serena.

He looks forward to writing and producing an EP in 2021 as part of his solo project, Kipper Snack.

The song "Mama" can be found on any music streaming platform.

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